Apparently, Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olson are dating. Lance gave Ashley one of those little "Love Strong" bracelets; she's wearing it as a belt.
- 02.12.08
Paris Hilton announced that she wants to take a goodwill trip to the African country of Rwanda. In response, Rwanda said thanks, but that they had all the diseases they could handle.
- 03.10.08
Prescription medications have been discovered in the drinking water supplies of at least 41 million Americans. They say the average glass of drinking water in America contains as many drugs as Amy Winehouse.
- 03.13.08
Actress Halle Berry gave birth to a baby girl last week. Berry’s doctor says the baby is fine and tha the mother is super fine.
- 03.24.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Jamie Lynn Spears got her high school diploma after passing her GED. As a result, in the Spears’ family, Jamie Lynn is now known as “The Professor.”
- 03.24.08
Prescription medications have been discovered in the drinking water supplies of at least 41 million Americans. I don’t think president Bush understands this – like today, he read the report and was shocked to learn our tap water contains the chemical H2O.
- 03.13.08
According to Britain’s “News of the World,” Paul McCartney’s ex-wife, Heather Mills, recorded a rap song back in 1999. She recorded it under her rap name, 50%.
- 04.14.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The New Kids on the Block have reunited and they’re planning to release a new album and go on tour. Experts said it was now or never for the New Kids and unfortunately they chose now.
- 04.14.08
Disgraced quarterback Michael Vick – he’s in prison now – says to make it fair when he plays football in prison, he winds up playing on both teams. But, you know, that happens to a lot of guys who go to prison.
- 04.16.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
In a new survey, Larry King was voted the un-sexiest host on television. Of course that’s bad news for Larry but a huge relief for the ladies of “The View.”
- 04.16.08
Vanilla Ice was charged with domestic battery. Do you know how they got him out of the house? Vanilla extract….
- 04.25.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
It’s been reported that singer Ashley Simpson just got engaged. Friends say Ashley wanted to find a guy who wasn’t threatened by her talent, and luckily that didn’t take long.
- 04.25.08
The Dallas Mavericks eliminated in the first round of the NBA Play-Offs; Dallas loss the series four games to 1 to the New Orleans Hornets. Dallas played so poorly, the fans now suspect someone on the team was dating Jessica Simpson.
- 05.02.08
Congratulations to Pamela Anderson, who has become an American citizen. She’s from Canada; her boobs of course are from Los Angeles.
- 05.08.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Paris Hilton and her fiancée went to Disney World last weekend, which explains why last weekend the most popular ride in Disney World was Paris Hilton.
- 05.08.08
It’s been reported in an upcoming TV special on the making of “Star Wars” that Carrie Fischer and hints that after a few drinks on the set of the movie, she and Harrison Ford had sex. So apparently, he got tired of being Han Solo….
- 05.09.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
In Los Angeles, a judge has ruled that Britney Spears can spend Mother’s Day with her kids. Britney’s kids are apparently thrilled because they’ve never been to a nightclub.
- 05.09.08
According to Fox News, Lindsay Lohan has recorded a song with Snoop Dogg for her upcoming album. They bill themselves as Run DUI.
- 05.22.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Paris Hilton says that when she gets married, she wants to wear a wedding dress from Dolce & Gabana. However, a spokesperson for Dolce & Gabana said they don’t make crotchless wedding dresses.
- 05.22.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The man who created the Backstreet Boys was sent to prison for 25 years on money laundering charges. To be fair, it was 5 years for money laundering and 20 years for creating the Backstreet Boys….
- 05.30.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The New Kids on the Block reunited last week on the “Today” show to perform an outdoor concert even though there were huge wind gusts and pouring rain. So, at least God tried to stop them….
- 06.02.08
In a surprise move, Christie Brinkley and her husband Peter Cook settled their rather ugly divorce. I’m glad they settled it: as you know there was a child involved, his girlfriend.
- 07.14.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
In a recent interview, Angelina Jolie said being pregnant is great for her sex life. Then she said wha’ts really great for her sex life is being Angelina Jolie.
- 07.14.08
Jamie Lynn Spears gave birth to a baby girl. Almost lost the baby: apparently, she gave it to Britney to hold for a minute.
- 07.24.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Angelina Jolie says that Brad Pitt is the hardest person to shop for because whenever he sees something he likes, he buys it. Meanwhile, Brad Pitt says Jolie is hard to shop for because whenever she sees something she likes, she adopts it.
- 07.24.08
Batman star Christian Bale was arrested for assaulting his 40 year-old sister and 61 year-old mother. It sounds like the Dark Knight has some white trash in him, too.
- 07.29.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Ben & Jerry announced that they are naming a new ice cream after Elton John. Ben & Jerry say it’s the perfect ice cream for anyone whose ever cooked at Elton John and said, “Um…I bet that would taste great.”
- 07.29.08
We had an earthquake yesterday – 5.4 on the Richter scale. In fact, it was shaking so hard that Pamela Anderson got two black eyes….
- 07.30.08
(more on yesterday’s Chino Hills earthquake….)
They say in an earthquake that you should try and take shelter at a safe place, so I ran out the door and quickly jumped over to ABC.
- 07.30.08
A camera man in New York City claims that he had an Alex Rodriguez/Madonna sex tape supposedly showing the two of them in a hotel room enjoying each others’ company. Bad news for the camera man: he cannot broadcast it without the express written permission of Major League Baseball.
- 08.01.08
Madonna’s brother is coming out with a book, “Life with My Sister Madonna.” Madonna’s brother claims she’s a self-obsessed, ego-maniac who thinks she’s the only person in the universe. Of course, Madonna was shocked that by this. She said, “What? I have a brother?”
- 08.01.08
Paris Hilton’s mother is very upset because John McCain has put Paris in his campaign video. Isn’t that amazing? Of all the videos Paris has been in, this is the one mom’s upset about?
- 08.07.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Britney Spears’ 17 year-old sister, Jamie Lynn Spears, says she’s planning on marrying the father of her baby by the end of the year. If you want to give them a wedding gift, Jamie Lynn is registered at Wal Mart’s Back-to-School section.
- 08.07.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The Olympic Opening Ceremony featured representatives from 205 countries. Or, as Angelina Jolie calls it, one-stop shopping.
- 08.13.08
According to a recent issue of “Time” magazine, America leads the world in marijuana and cocaine use. You know who’s second? Amy Winehouse.
- 08.15.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Rolling Stone Ron Woods said that he realized that he had a drinking problem when he ran off with a 19 year-old Russian cocktail waitress. Of course, to most men, that’s not a drinking problem – that’s a drinking success.
- 08.15.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Britney Spears has agreed to star in a movie where she plays a psychotic lesbian. The name of the film, “The Lindsay Lohan Story.”
- 08.25.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Angelina Jolie reportedly told police that she's worried that her children will be kidnapped. However, the police told Jolie not to worry because no one has a car that big.
- 09.09.08
From THE TONIGHT SHOW with JAY LENO:
Scientists say celebrities tend to be more narcissistic than the general public. That’s why I don’t hang around celebrities – because they rather talk about themselves than talk about me.
- 09.11.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
In a recent interview, Brad Pitt says that his new baby daughter, Vivianne, takes after her mother, Angelina Jolie. Pitt said, for instance, Vivianne has already adopted six orphans.
- 09.11.08
Lance Armstrong told “Men’s Journal” magazine he wasn’t into having sex when he was training in his racing days. He said when you’re riding a bike for 6 to 7 hours a day, you don’t feel like sex. I don’t know about that. I know that after 6 to 7 hours of having sex, I don’t feel like riding a bike.
- 09.15.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Amy Winehouse recently appeared at a music festival and demanded her dressing room be stocked with 50 bottles of Jack Daniels. So, the good news is, she’s cutting back.
- 09.15.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
A new study found that 52% of college women say they would sleep with Angelina Jolie. I’d just like to say: Prove it.
- 09.24.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Researchers in UCLA have found a way for women to have an orgasm in 3 minutes. His name is Antonio Banderas.
- 10.07.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
A new study in Britain identifies nine different types of problems, and it turns out eight of them are Amy Winehouse.
- 10.10.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The National Enquirer just came out and it is reporting that Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant again. In a related story, the sex education teacher at Jamie Lynn’s high school has finally been fired.
- 10.15.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
In a recent interview, Angelina Jolie said she wants to adopt another baby. Jolie said she made the decision after consulting Brad Pitt and Google Earth.
- 10.21.08
According to a new study by scientists at the University of Calgary in Alberta, Canada, sex releases a brain growth hormone that makes you smart; the more sex you have, the smarter you are. Just two words: Paris Hilton.
- 10.22.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Comedian Roseanne Barr says that someone has stolen a sex tape from her. As a result, police are checking hospitals for any man who can’t stop vomiting.
- 10.22.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Angelina Jolie said in a recent interview that she has never learned how to cook. Jolie said if she’s in the mood for a little Chinese, she adopts one.
- 10.24.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Celine Dion has demanded that during her concert tour, she gets to bring along her personal dentist. Celine says she likes to hang around her dentist because he also likes to inflict pain.
- 10.30.08
From THE TONIGHT SHOW with JAY LENO:
InTouch magazine reports that Nicolette Sheridan left Michael Bolton and is now dating David Spade. In this economy, everybody is downsizing.
- 11.05.08
The latest celebrity gossip is at a Miami nightclub, Kate Hudson tried to seduce Alex Rodriguez by doing a sexy dance in front of him, but Alex said he prefers blondes twice her age.
- 11.25.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The other night at a Miami nightclub, they said that actress Kate Hudson tried to seduce Yankee slugger Alex Rodriguez by dancing in front of him, but that A. Rod did not react. Afterwards, A. Rod explained that he often freezes up when there’s potential to score.
- 11.25.08
It’s being reported that Disney may make a movie starring Paris Hilton. That’s another Disney film based on a ride….
- 12.08.08
From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Paris Hilton recently confirmed rumors that she’s broken up with her boyfriend Benji Madden. Paris said she put Benji behind her and not in a fun way….
- 12.08.08 |
