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Celebrity Observations Politics Sex Topical
 

 

 

NQs Jokes (Notable Quotables) holds last week's jokes as well as all NQs from 1994 and 1995, a smattering of 1996's NQs, all NQs from 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, and 2006, as well as year-to-date 2007 NQs.  NQs Jokes is updated weekly (more or less) but join free and you'll get up-to-date NQs delivered to your e-mail.  

Last week's Notable Quotables (week of 08.15.07):

Most jokes are from THE TONIGHT SHOW with JAY LENO unless specifically noted otherwise.  Please forgive any honest mistakes; I do my best to give credit where credit is due. E-mail any questions or suggestions to admin@notablequotables.com.

Paris Hilton selling her house in the Hollywood Hills, saying that she wants more privacy. I think she should keep the house and sell the video camera.

(more on Paris’ mansion sale….)
Paris Hilton’s Hollywood mansion is now for sale, $4.3 million. They say the home is equipped with a professional video studio, or as she calls it, the master bedroom.
- 08.15.07
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Researchers at the University of Texas have identified 237 reasons why human beings have sex. Actually, the 237 reason came from women, the men don’t need a reason.

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
In South Dakota, a man has been arrested for stealing traffic signs and then masturbating on them. The cops arrested the man and told him “Stop” means stop.
- 08.16.07
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According to “Brides” magazine, nearly one-third of wedding ceremonies now include a dog. You think that’s bad – two-thirds of bachelor parties now include a donkey….

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The results of president Bush's annual physical were recently released and it was revealed that last year president Bush got a rash from a tick bite. After hearing this, Bill Clinton said, "A rash from a tick bite? I'll have to remember that one."
- 08.17.07

Find more NQs Jokes, divided into five categories of interest:

Celebrity.  These NQs are about, or mention, celebrities.

Observations/Philosophical.   NQs with a decidedly different world view.

Politics.  Is politics, "Hollywood for ugly people."

Sex.  Jokes about, uhm, sex. 

Topical.  Take a look at the "topical" past, present, and...future.
For your amusement, click here to read these "special" never-before-and-will-never-be emailed NQs, straight from The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, or from other (almost as funny) sources.
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