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A man in Wisconsin has been arrested for having sex with a dead deer. The police are no giving his name; they are just reporting him as a John Doe.
- 01.03.07

(more on the man having sex with a dead deer….)
The man said he was just rebelling against his wife. Every night she would say, “No dear, no dear.”
- 01.03.07

According to a recent poll by “Woman’s Day” magazine, 60% of women believe in ghosts. That’s because they’ve seen how quickly guys can disappear after sex.
- 01.04.07

According to diet experts in "Allure" magazine, the average woman can burn up to 500 calories in an hour of love-making. The bad news? The average guy only lasts 5 calories.
- 01.08.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
According to statistics just released by the Census Bureau, 6% of men say they have had a homosexual experience. The experience ranges from having sex with another man to owning more than one Clay Aiken album.
- 01.11.07

1 in 4 women say they have negative images of their body during sex. Women, let me put your mind at ease. 9 times out of 10, the guy is thinking of some other women’s body during sex.
- 01.12.07

Doctors in China have performed what is being described as the world’s first penis transplant. The operation went well, but after two weeks his body rejected it. So the man has no penis now. In fact, his friends say he’s just nuts.
- 01.17.07

A guy in China was the first to have a penis transplant. Had it removed. That’s got to make life difficult – without a penis? What’s a man supposed to think with?
- 01.17.07

According to a poll of singles, the number 1 trait that men look for in women is a sense of humor. You know how to make a woman laugh? Tell her the number 1 thing that men look for in women is a sense of humor.
- 01.18.07

A new study says that the number 1 quality men find attractive in a woman is her sense of humor. They especially like it when they laugh at a joke and their boobs bounce up and down.
- 01.18.07

A female librarian at a school in West Virginia has been suspended for having an inappropriate relationship with two male students. Now the kids are worried because the librarian is two weeks overdue….
- 01.26.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
A study was recently done to see which smells put people in the mood for sex. It turns out that the most erotic scent is a combination of lavender and pumpkin pie. That makes sense – I mean who doesn’t get turned on when they smell an old lady at Thanksgiving?
- 01.26.07

According to a new survey in “Self” magazine, 40% of its readers have gone six months without sex; which explains why they’re fans of “Self” magazine.
- 02.05.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
This weekend in Atlantic City, a New Jersey woman gave birth to her baby in the middle of a casino. The gamblers who were there said the baby was the only thing to come out of a slot all day.
- 02.09.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
New York’s health commissioner marked Valentine’s Day by unveiling a new line of New York City condoms. The New York condoms come in two sizes: Empire State Building and Little Italy….
- 02.15.07

According to “Glamour” magazine, 4 out of 10 women say they will have sex on the third date. So guys, all you have to do is take her out to breakfast, lunch, and dinner….
- 02.20.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
According to a new survey, 26% of people say they have a crush on someone they work with. Unfortunately, the survey was taken at NASA.
- 02.20.07

According to the AskMen website, lipstick on your collar will disappear when rubbed with petroleum jelly. If you’re a guy and you’re walking around carrying petroleum jelly, chances are you’re not kissing a woman….
- 03.06.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
In Hong Kong, a 107 year-old man says he’s lived so long because of his decision to give up sex. When asked why he gave up sex, the 107 year-old man said he had to because he likes older women….
- 03.28.07

Doctors in England report that a 28 year-old female patient has 250 orgasms a day. Now here’s a woman who should have her own reality show.
- 03.29.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
The city of New York announced that it is coming out with its own brand of condoms that come in different wrappers to represent the different subway lines. Their slogan is, “Take the F Train to the G Spot.”
- 04.20.07

The Oregon senate has approved a bill that will allow ex-prostitutes to become teachers. I believe the name of the bill is, “Every Child Gets Some Behind.”
- 05.25.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Recently in New York, a school teacher received a box without a return address that contained twelve pounds of marijuana. Afterwards, the teacher said it sure beat the hell out of an apple.
- 05.25.07

According to a Harlequin Romance survey, 55% of men will tell a woman, “I love you,” just to have sex with her. The other 45% of guys said even that doesn’t work.
- 06.05.07

A new study just released says Viagra can cure jetlag. Talk about snakes on a plane….
- 06.12.07

The owner of the Los Angeles Lakers, 74 year-old Jerry Buss was arrested on a DUI with a 23 year-old woman in his car. Actually, isn’t that what the Lakers need right now? Someone that can drive and score?
- 06.13.07

Half the people interviewed say they have had sex with another employee at work. Here’s the weird part – it was all with the same employee.
- 06.13.07

According to a new report by the National Center for Health Statistics, fewer and fewer high school students are having sex today. So that proves there’s a teacher shortage.
- 07.17.07

In Wisconsin, a 38 year-old female substitute teacher was accused with having sex with a 13 year-old male student. Well, you know what they say about substitutes – they’re always easier than the regular teacher.
- 07.27.07

From Late Night with Conan O'Brien:
Jim Mitchell, one of porn’s most prolific movie producers, recently past away. In tribute, hundreds of male porn stars were at half mast.
- 07.27.07

Porn star Jenna Jameson coming out with her own line of comic book heroes. I believe they’re called, “Fantastic On All Fours.”
- 08.09.07

 
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